Four generations

This is a picture that shows four generations of my family. My daughters are 6 and 8, I am 36, my mom is 65, my father is 68, and my grandfather is 99.

My long time mentor, Ralph, once asked me a simple question that has stuck with me ever since:

“At what age will you start to close the gap on your parents?”

In other words, on what birthday will you turn the age that your parents were when they had you? Before that age, the difference between your age and your parents is always greater than your age. Afterwards, the difference gets smaller and smaller.

It was such a simple question but ended up meaning a lot to me and was a springboard for a lot of thought. Mathematically, it is a fairly simple question with a straightforward but satisfying answer.

My father had me when he was 32, so my 32^nd birthday was a very special one for me. I spent a lot of time reflecting on where I was in life and what lay ahead. I thought about where my father was at that age, how he spent his time, and what kinds of goals he had.

When I turned 32, I was at a crossroads in my career and making decisions about how I wanted to develop and grow as an educator. I was (and still am) happily married with three wonderful children – trying to balance a demanding career that I was passionate about while still nurturing their growth and development.

At that age, my father was preparing to leave the only home he’d ever known to immigrate to a country he knew nothing about with nothing more than the clothes on his back. Along with my mother, and now two young children, his only goal was to provide a future with more opportunities for success and happiness than he thought was possible by staying in his homeland. It was a courageous move – one that I will forever be grateful for.

Now here we are, all together in Vietnam. We are able to take this picture of four generations. My kids are able to meet a great-grandparent for the first time. It has been an opportunity for their young, curious minds to learn about family and aging. They’ve asked me tonnes of questions on this trip as they try to wrap their minds around living such a long life.

My daughters always argue with each other about their ages – my middle daughter is convinced that one day she will surpass her older sister in age. Her younger sister reminds her that with every year that she gets older, her big sister gets older as well – she will never catch up.

Conversations about numbers that have such a personal connection do not feel like math. As Dan Meyer says, the numbers and the math serve the conversation – not the other way around. I love noticing these conversations in the people around me whether it is my own kids or students at school. It helps them see the purpose, and true relevance of mathematical thinking…

…or maybe I just wanted a reason to give this small tribute on my blog to my grandfather who turns 100 this year and thank him for starting such a strong foundation to a loving family.